Friendships go through ebbs and flows. When we are in relationships with others, there will be times of joy and celebration, as well as times when life gets messy and hard.
At Becoming Anchored, we are here to support you on your journey to healthier friendships. We believe you are capable of cultivating hope and embracing self-compassion along the way.
No matter how rocky the tides of life get, we are dedicated to providing you and your loved ones a safe harbor in times of pain and hurt.
Hurting is not limited to a single definition. Perhaps you have a friend who is going through a divorce or has a change in their financial state. Your friend may be grieving the loss of a loved one or the loss of a job. Whatever shape or form pain takes for you and your loved ones is valid.
3 Thoughtful Ways to Support a Hurting Friend
In our friendships, we want to be intentional about showing up for the good times, hard times, and all the times in between. Here are ways to mindfully care for your loved ones.
1. Be Present
One of the most beautiful ways to support a hurting friend is giving our presence; letting them know we are here for them.
The ability to bear witness, validate their pain, support nervous system regulation, and being present are wonderful gifts of friendship. If you are unsure what else to do for your friend, simply show up and be there.
2. Cultivate Options
Perhaps how we feel best supported might not be how someone else might feel best supported. Recognizing these differences is a gift we can give our friends, by asking: How can I best support you?
You can extend kindness by asking: What do you need? What would be most helpful for you?
Cultivating options can also be helpful: Do you want a listening ear, validation, or encouragement? Do you just want me to come over and watch a movie with you? Do you want to do an activity that lifts your mood and spirit?
3. Resist Rushing
When a loved one is hurting, they might have a big emotional response. As a friend, it can be challenging to bear witness to that pain. You may feel the pressure to have all of the answers or quickly fix the problems.
I kindly challenge you to resist the urge to fix, dismiss, or avoid your loved one’s emotions.
Rather than rushing your friend through a timeline around their pain, giving your friend permission to be exactly where they are can be another wonderful gift.
Self-Compassion Reminder:
We want to kindly remind you to take care of yourself and extend the same compassion you give to your friends to yourself.
As you comfort your loved ones, notice your own emotional tolerance and responses. If you notice you are feeling drained after being around a hurting friend, that is okay. Resist the urge to judge the feelings that may arise.
Be intentional, set boundaries when appropriate, and lovingly tend your own emotional needs.
Additional Resources
Navigating Friendship as an Adult Woman:
We understand how challenging friendships are as an adult woman. You may feel misunderstood, scared to show up authentically, or like you are not given the same support you give.
We understand how challenging it is to feel like you do not belong or are cared for, which is why we created this educational wellness course. Taught by a licensed therapist, you will learn how to foster friendships that are joyful and uplifting.
From attachment styles to healthy boundary setting, you will be equipped with the necessary skills to maintain fulfilling relationships.
It is your time to feel connected and supported. Register now to discover genuine belonging and lasting friendships.
Empowering Affirmation:
“I have the strength to care for my loved ones and extend that same compassion to myself.”
Becoming Anchored in Hope,
Laura
LPC-MHSP, CEDS-C, ACS, NCC
At Becoming Anchored Co., we are dedicated to supporting individuals on their journey toward personal growth and well-being. Our mission is to provide tools and insights that foster resilience, connection, and authenticity.
Our evidence-based resources, including our podcast and courses, are designed to empower you. We have also curated a selection of thoughtfully designed products to help you stay anchored, that you can wear on your path to discovery and growth.
We believe in the importance of creating a nurturing and inclusive environment where every story is valued and honored. Join us in our commitment to thriving and flourishing together.
How To Help a Hurting Friend
