Supporting your child through difficult emotions can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re unsure how to respond in the moment. Children experience emotions deeply, often before they can fully articulate what they’re feeling. In this guide, we’ll explore effective strategies for supporting your child through difficult emotions in ways that nurture their emotional growth while building trust and connection.
Understanding Emotions in the Body
Before emotions become thoughts, they manifest physically in the body. A key aspect of supporting your child through difficult emotions is helping them identify where those emotions show up physically. Does your child feel anger in their fists or stomach? Does sadness rest in their chest or throat? By encouraging your child to notice these physical sensations, you help them connect their emotions to their body, fostering emotional awareness from a young age.
The Emotional Wave
Emotions often come in waves, cresting and falling over time. Most emotions last around 90 seconds, but they can feel overwhelming when they peak. Part of supporting your child through difficult emotions is helping them recognize that these feelings are temporary. The discomfort is often most intense at the height of the wave, but it will pass. What can complicate emotions is the story we tell ourselves about them. Help your child distinguish between the emotion itself and any unhelpful thoughts that follow, preventing them from getting stuck in their feelings.
How to Show Up for Your Child
When supporting your child through difficult emotions, it’s essential to focus on being present rather than rushing to fix the problem. One of the best ways to do this is through nonverbal cues and co-regulation. Here are some practical ways to show up for your child:
- Get on their level: Sit or kneel to meet their eyes.
- Make eye contact: This shows that you’re engaged and fully present.
- Offer nonverbal reassurance: A hug or gentle nod can comfort your child.
- Practice co-regulation: Your calm presence helps regulate their heightened emotional state.
This kind of connection teaches your child that you are there for them, regardless of how overwhelming their emotions may feel.
Avoiding the Urge to Fix or Minimize
In moments of discomfort, our instinct is often to minimize or fix the problem quickly. However, true support for your child through difficult emotions comes from letting them feel and process without rushing the experience. Avoid phrases like "it’s not that bad" or "you’ll get over it." Instead, validate their feelings with responses such as, "I see you're upset," or "It sounds like you're feeling sad." This acknowledgment helps them trust their emotions and know they’re not alone.
Cultivating Curiosity Around Emotions
A valuable part of supporting your child through difficult emotions is cultivating a spirit of curiosity. Encourage your child to explore what they might need in the moment. Do they want a hug? Time outside? Or perhaps they need a snack? Teaching children to connect their emotional experiences with potential solutions fosters emotional intelligence and self-care.
AFFIRMATION OF THE DAY: "I show up with presence and patience for my child's emotional needs."
Supporting your child through difficult emotions is an ongoing journey that requires patience, presence, and understanding. Dr. Rebecca Kennedy of @drbeckyatgoodinside has some phenomenal resources for extra support. By using these strategies, you can help your child navigate their emotional world with confidence, knowing that they have your support every step of the way.
Becoming Anchored in Hope,
Laura
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